Tuesday, 16 June 2009

He's still there ...

... Dad, that is, in Respite - except it's not now! On Friday, while away on the House Party weekend I had a call from the carers at the Respite home. Selfishly, I immediately wished that I wasn't being called home! With all that's happened over the past months I really needed this break away. Anyhow, it was them expressing concern at his mobility and asking if they could keep him longer so that he could receive some intensive physiotherapy. I've no problem with that and at least I knew he was being looked after, especially as they also suspected that he had a urinary infection.

Visited yesterday to take him more of his medication but he wanted to go home. He said he couldn't take another day or two in there as it wasn't like it was before and he hated it. He then wept. Seems he does have a urinary infection and he's obviously not feeling too well but what was upsetting him most were the 'accidents' he was having. I think he feels he's lost his dignity - which, in some respects, he has. The staff are finding it difficult to understand the change in him - from being reasonably independent, mobile, cheerful and helpful to an old man who is not being co-operative, argumentative and not at all cheerful or helpful. He's very confused but that could be the infection, although he was like that before he went last Monday - he's just not getting any better. From what he described he's already getting physio .... in a gym!

Today they planned to move him from Respite into Intermediate Care. The place he stays in is known as a Resource Centre for the short term care of the elderly through Respite, Rehabilitation following hospital stays and Intermediate Care to prevent unnecessary hospital admission. In the area he's moving to he will have a dedicated Social worker, nurse, home care support worker, physiotherapist, occupational therapist and administrator who will work together to find the best way of supporting him so that he can return home with a full and proper care package for his needs now. He will be completely assessed, both physically and mentally so I'm expecting him to now be officially diagnosed with dementia. I would be very surprised if he's not! This stay could just be for another week but it could be for up to 6 weeks.

Poor Dad wasn't happy when I told him but, by the time I left him, he was a lot happier than when I arrived. I think he was extremely confused and hadn't understood anything that was happening to him. I'm not sure he completely understands now but he seemed less stressed.....

I'll pop in later in the week to see how he's settling in the new section - different floor, different room, different staff but hopefully they will be able to get him right - whatever that is for him nowadays. They did say that residential care will be a completely last resort as 'it's not very nice'. They've confirmed to me that his new home should be able to give him the same level of care as a residential home except he has his own flat for his independence - it's why it's been built - so from that point of view he is extremely lucky to have got in there. It's just getting him settled and finding the right level of care then he should be OK.

Went past his old home today and it's being gutted by the look of it. I'd left the nets up at the windows to make it look as though it was still occupied but they'd been taken down and there was stuff (looked like wood) thrown on the front garden. Reckon they're pulling out the old kitchen and bathroom and possibly even changing the boiler. 55 years living in that house with the original 'kitchen' - term used loosely for one wall cupboard, sink with cupboard under, larder and space for a cooker, fridge and washing machine (although not 50+ years ago - *lol*) - and the original bathroom and toilet. He moves out and what happens? All new stuff when they've managed without for all those years! The workmen outside watched me drive past. It was if they knew that I was connected.

Thanks for dropping by .....

4 comments:

Jak Heath said...

Well what can I add to what you've already said Pam? you are right he is in the best place to get the care he needs, fingers crossed you see a big change on your next visit.

Maureen said...

Hope that your Dad will soon be better Pam sounds as if you need some TLC so a big hug from me

Pamela said...

Sending you lots of hugs Pam. I do know what you are going through, as we have been through a very similar experience with Brian's Dad. Try not to let it get you down - easier said than done I know.

Pam

Jan R said...

Sounds like your Dad has the best care and attention now Pam to get him better and ready to go back to his new home. It's been a big change for him so no wonder he's confused about things. I do hope you see an improvement in him soon.