Friday, 1 October 2010

Think I know ...

... why I seem to have lost the will to blog at the moment! Shit happens!

My life seems to be full of highs and lows and has been for a while. The trouble seems to be there's more lows than highs and, although I feel I should be recording everything, I just can't seem to bring myself to do so. I guess losing the will to blog, or to do anything if I'm honest, is better than losing the will to live but ...
I try to push the bad stuff to the back of my mind but it's increasingly coming to the fore and there just doesn't seem to be much I can do to stop it. Circumstances - or people - won't let it.

Had a lovely weekend away with friends last weekend, although there were the odd niggles there that took the gloss off for me. Perhaps I was being a bit over sensitive but I know I let them (the niggles) show a few times and I shouldn't have done but then why should I pretend everything is sweet if it's not! Came home with some sort of bug which has laid me low and hence not in the best frame of mind then along comes that shit that spoils everything. Seems the weekend was sandwiched by shit really so perhaps that's why I found niggles which I might not have noticed otherwise. I don't know. Don't know much about anything at the moment, just totally confused, upset, angry, disappointed and up at silly o'clock in the morning because I can't sleep for it all going round in my head. Mind you - I might be getting a few answers ... or not ... so perhaps it's not such a bad thing.

Seems the only time I blog now is when there's something that I need to write down to get it off my chest, even if it's all a bit cryptic!

Thanks for dropping by .....


Janet said...

I am so sorry you feel so low and trodden down by circumstances and PEOPLE. I had a very prolonged bad patch a couple of years ago and I forced myself to keep a journal about how I felt. It was very hard at first and I wrote very little apart from expletives but gradually the entries became longer and I got the anger and hurt off my chest. I threw the journal away recently - no need to keep it any more.
Thinking of you
Janet xx

Jackie said...

Hi Pam,sorry you are feeling so low at the moment. I hope things improve for you and you start to feel better.

Take care.

Jackie p xx

Budge said...

Pam so sorry to read you are so down.Dont let them grind you down gal you are worth more than that.
Havent a clue what it is all about but please keep up your Ramblings if only to let off steam.
Sylv xx

Toni said...

Huge Hugs Pam dont let the niggles get to you stomp on them even have a little jump just so they stay down and carry on letting off steam we all need to xxxxx

Jackie said...

Sorry to hear you in a bit of a bad place right now... keep ya chin up gal... and think... another 208 days !!!!! . big hugs... J. xx (ring if want natter) xxx

JanM said...

oh dear what with niggles and shit you are obviously not in a very nice place at the moment. Please try and keep smiling - things will get better eventually- and I know that because I was way down a while ago but am much better now :oD
Take care xxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Oh dear Pam, sorry to hear you are in such a bad place at the moment. Keep blogging and get it off your chest - we all need to do that at some time!

Try not to let the niggles or people get you down too much - it's not worth it. Thinking of you and hoping that you will soon be feeling better

Pottyannie xx